Tivo Blogging All Star Saturday Night

By Craig Kwasniewski

All-Star Saturday Night has always been one of my favorite events of the entire NBA All-Star Weekend. Maybe it's because I always find myself waxing nostalgia for the great moments of the 1980's, like MJ in the dunk contest or Bird's throwing up the #1 sign as he wins the three-point shootout. But I also love that all the significant ballers in the association gear up and hang out for the night. If All-Star Weekend was a wedding, this would be the rehearsal dinner, with people eating, getting drunk and doing their "I love you man!" speeches.

Anyway, here's some quick takes that I jotted down while watching All-Star Saturday Night on Tivo:

Haier Shooting Stars

-David Robinson needs to take advice from Kareem, MJ and Samuel Jackson and shave his damn head.
-So the big change to all star Saturday night is to add a final round to the Shooting Stars competition? Why not have a half-court shot competition?
-Haier Shooting Stars brought to you by Chinese prison labor (they're headquartered in China).
-I'll take even odds on Duncan and Robinson Chinese Finger Cuffing (brought to you by Haier) that WNBA chick.

PlayStation® Skills Challenge

-Big question for skills competition: will Kidd spit on his Nets jersey?
-Hey Mavs fans, with Kidd comes a bajillion shots of his son sitting courtside. Do you REALLY need this?
-Second big question: will D-Wade wear a #32 with "fuck you" on the back?
-How very Miami Heat of Wade to have a turnover in the skills competition... A turnover?????
-Inspector LeBron James? Is it raining inside the New Orleans Arena?
-Maybe Dallas should reconsider the Kidd trade after seeing the Skills Competition (and CP3 and Williams skillz)... And thank Devean George along the way. Again, non-stop shots of Kidd's son!
-Yay, a bunch of corporate tools win a PS3!
-Why do we have to vote for the greatest dunk ever... every.. single.. year?

Foot Locker Three-Point Shootout

-Nice to see the band "White Man Overbite" do the opening montage to the Three-Point Shootout.
-Even Barkley and Jet Smith miss the first two events, and so do half of the fans. Again, can't we spruce this thing up with higher payouts or better competitions?
-You can see that Rip practiced for this, but not for the line (he stepped over a ton).
-Can someone please say Money Shot?
-Boobie was the tits (stupid joke, but what do you expect after a few beers?).
-Nash gets 9, which is in Canadian dollars, so it's really 15.
-WOW, the world is near the end: Eli Manning doing a Gatorade "worldofclutch.com" add. Even Giant fans have trouble believeing that one! (Believe me, in 10 years we'll be asking ourselves how he got a SB MVP.
-Can't they allow Dirk to shoot with Rammstein playing? (Du Hast Me!)
-Dirk's arc goes higher than the shot clock... Awesome!
-Funniest remark of the night, "is Damon Jones still in this league?"
-Dirk almost hit the camera with the arc!
-Props to Kapono! Another Miami Heat moment? Oh yeah, Pat Riley let him go and traded for Rickey Davis. Let's ask Wade for his thoughts... "Fuck you, Riles!!!"

2008 Sprite Slam Dunk

-Soooo pedictable to have Dr. John sing before the dunk contest (read: piss break). You're telling me that there's no other entertainers from New Orleans? They literally roll this guy out for every sporting event in New Orleans.
-Why give Magic Johnson a mic? Does it come with subtitles?
-Moon opens strong!
-Dwight Howard with a flat out 10! Not just for behind the backboard, but for the windmill follow-up.
-Birthday cake looks promising, but call it correct: Cupcake.
-Magic with his annual "The slam dunk is back!" He literally does this every year.
-Cupcake is a 10 for creativity! Reminds me of the Sticker Dunk from last year. And the voters did the same thing and screwed over the most creative dunk so far.
-How did Daryl Dawkins give an 8 for the Cupcake Dunk? His nickname is Chocolate Thunder... It was a chocolate cupcake!!!

-Rudy Gay's dunk is more like a 9 compared to Howard and Green.
-Moon can't use a one dimensional jump shooter (Kapono) to pass for his dunk.
-Green's second dunk was an 8.
-Dwight Howard is a pure showman!!! The Superman Dunk ranks up there with the best ever for the hype alone.
-All these creative dunks give me an idea... The scoring system should be broken into two parts: creativity and physicality. Just to rate all these dunks on the same 10 scale doesn't give it justice.
-Gerald Green's first dunk in the final was a 9.5 (between legs off a toss)
-Again Dwight Howard's 1st dunk in the finals would get a 10 for creativity along with a 10 for physicality (the switch hands off the glass one).
-Socks dunk would have been better earlier, but not after Howard's show-stoppers.
-"Let's go home!" Kenny Smith appropriately said it best after Howard's last dunk. Hands down, Howard was the most creative ever!
-Magic needs to stop saying "it is back!" for the 27th year in a row!
-There's no need to go "American Idol" by giving the judges a mic; just awkward and a total momentum killer. Even Sheryl Miller had to pull the plug on Dr. J's endless old-guy rant.
-Finally, Dwight Howard deserves to win with the unique creativity along with his imprssive skills... a good way to end an above-average All-Star Saturday Night.

Comments

[khal]

lol @ chinese finger cuffs - for a wnba chick, she was kind of fly!

[dwight4prez]

ha, dwight totally stole the night. i actually saw him practicing the switch-hands one earlier in the week:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bIz7sYjp1Sc

...guess it paid off. Sick.

[BMerc]

Chinese finger cuff huh? You have to appreciate the versatility of the English language!

[Jordan Flipsyde]

When the love letter, do you still remember? The plot of the story is me!!!!!

[Creative Recreation]

Your webpage content is specifically what I necessary, I like your blog, I sincerely wish your website can be a rapid enhance in visitors, I will help you market your blog and glimpse forward for your web page continually updated and turned into even more towards the additional rich and colorful.Welcome to visit my web http://www.sneakers4sales.com

[nike air max]

Nice piece. I'd be interested to find out more of your thoughts on this issue.

[nike air max 90]

game every season. That being said, you think he would just "have" a stress fracture JUST to play for China? No player WANTS to be injured, and as much of a joke you make of this 21 game streak, I'm sure Yao would

[supra tk society]

very nice,i like it very much.It is a harvest journey for me when after have a careful look of your blog.Thank you for constantly posting of so many useful tips.They are such a great help to me.Thank you very much!

[ugg boots outlet]

I wonder what year that was because my parents got six-foot heroes for just about every party I can remember as a kid. I'm going to investigate. Stay tuned or help me out by Commenting below.

[Supra Footwear]

I "like" you on Facebook. Would love these for my oldest boy!

[air max sneakers]

People will no doubt argue that some data is much better than no data, and while that’s true: for a new federal office to engage with such an important topic with the weight of history and the whole administration behind it and then come up with something this limited is disappointing.

[fake oakleys]

Oakley standard oakley standard sunglasses wholesale standard internet website near to the 1975 bicycle grip Oakley oakley standard sunglasses wholesale at that time we may nicely have not believed a founder fake oakleys JimJannard creation Unobtainium high quality, fashionable design & Timely Delivery by EMS. So we win lots of regular customers from all over the world, especially from United states and Canada,Western Europe (Italy, UK, France, Spain, & Germany etc)

[nike air max]

Rich Nike production of abrasive products for the cubic boron nitride is a synthetic material, is currently the world recognized as the hardest in the high temperature synthetic material made from PCBN tool air max 87 is currently processing superhard cutting tool to the best of ferrous metal materials, known as the "Industrial teeth. Rich Nike the PCBN cubic boron nitride blade series products, rich Nike following the global authority and professional manufacturer of CBN abrasive, the use of self-development and production of nanoscale CBN powder, combined with a number of patented technologies, air max 90 and advanced high temperature and pressure The process of micro-crystalline sintered cutting blade, the new product of the revolutionary changes of the cutting industry.

[cheap oakleys]

The Atlanta Braves first baseman showed up. fake oakleys to Turner Field in Atlanta on Wednesday filled with anticipation. It wasn’t because the Braves were beginning a playoff series or celebrating a historic occasion. Wednesday’s game was your average, run-of-the-mill regular season game. For Freeman however this game represented something more. The young slugger was expecting a package before the game; a package that could turn his season around after weeks of frustration. cheap oakleys It’s contents? A fresh pair of custom Oakley Rx Fast Jacket™ XL glasses with Oakley True Digital™ corrective lenses and Oakley Dual-Peripheral Technology™.