By Craig Kwasniewski
Hey ladies, tired of all the good guys being married or gay? Trying to look for the sensitive bad guy? Well here's you big chance to make it happen. Step up to the plate and win a date with Zach Randolph!
He's tall, he's rich, he "considers himself a gangstar," he's the starting forward for the Portland Trailblazers who ironically has stated, "I'm a gangstar not a Blazer."
He's Zachary McKenzie Randolph, and ladies, with the right bid he may be yours for one date.
Your date starts off with meeting Mr. Randolph's "Hoop Family" at Exotica International, a fine establishment where you'll spend time consuming the finest libations at Zach's private table.
But that's just the beginning. The winning bidder then follows up with a cash "gift" in the amount of $500 in exchange for lesbian sex with a partner of Zach's choice, most likely someone from his extended "Hoop Family."
After hearing the magic words, "do it again" from Zach Randolph, the winner continues to consume copious amounts of libations with her man. After falling asleep with the eligible bachelor, forcible anal sex will be applied.
If you're lucky, Zach Randolph will serenade you with a birthday song.
Ladies how can you resist... oh sorry, you're not allowed to resist. Oh well, have fun!
More Zach-iness:
Complaint of Sexual Assault and Battery Against Zach Randolph
The $2 Million Complaint Against Zach Randolph @ Truehoop.com
Love this movie as well as the serial. Really funny, thanks for sharing it with us.
Posted by: yiwu agent | October 15, 2010 at 06:23 PM
I can appreciate the attempt of an artist to engage with social networking and new media. When I first saw this blurb (on Facebook) I became excited because I thought I'd be seeing an artist really using the tools and actual medium of social networking as raw materials for art. This, unfortunately, is just tracing.
Posted by: yiwu china | October 15, 2010 at 06:51 PM
What a well-researched article — thanks for putting in the time to look into the back-stories of all these famous brands. I had no idea the Twitter bird came from iStockPhoto, of all places!
Posted by: one dollar watches | October 15, 2010 at 07:30 PM
Yes, life needs gratefulness. Gratefulness is not only confined to love, but also to friendship, family bonds, mutual cherishing as well as constant missing each other!
Posted by: Replica Christian Louboutin Shoes | February 23, 2011 at 04:32 PM
Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
21
Posted by: Air Max 95 | August 01, 2011 at 06:25 PM
Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
32
Posted by: Cheap Sandals | August 01, 2011 at 06:29 PM
Yes, life needs gratefulness. Gratefulness is not only confined to love, but also to friendship, family bonds, mutual cherishing as well as constant missing each other!
Posted by: besthowdy | September 20, 2011 at 02:00 AM
Don't know what is wrong what is rite but i know that every one has there own point of view and same goes to this one
Posted by: Belstaff Coat Sale | March 12, 2012 at 06:02 AM