by Craig Kwasniewski
Crash goes the Cleveland Cavaliers in game 7 against the Detroit Pistons! Their season is over after losing 79-61 in Detroit on Sunday.
Crash goes the LeBron James Bandwagon!
Crash goes the ESPN sponsored fellatio-fest of LeBron James.
Cash goes the absurd/intellectually irresponsible/ridiculous/insane/retarded notion that LeBron James is better than Michael Jordan (at any age, minus the Bullets years, because they never happened).
Crash goes the most annoying PA announcer in the history of professional sports, that
retarded "special" guy from Cleveland.
Crash goes the hopes of a Dwyane Wade - LeBron James playoff series and the probable (yet absurd) comparisons to the Bird - Magic rivalry of the 80's.
Crash goes the absurd/intellectually irresponsible/ridiculous/insane/retarded notion of the Cavs making the NBA Finals. (Especially with THAT roster!)
Crash goes the Miami Heat chances of getting an NBA Finals appearance. Not happening guys! The Pistons know how to beat you.
Crash goes the ratings for ABC/ESPN for the rest of the playoffs. Nobody will watch the Spurs-Pistons II (The Mavs have no chance on Monday night).
Crash goes the endless rotation of the one "We Are All Witnesses" commercial. With all that money you're telling me that Nike couldn't make two or three more commercials. Or did they run out of Cleveland highlights after 30 seconds.
Crash goes LeBron and his three illegal moves that the refs have embraced. (I thought I saw Knick Bavetta high five LeBron after an "And-1")
Crash goes Anderson Varejao and the 3,423 ways to pronounce his last name. There is no N in your last name! Stop saying VAR-EH-JEAN!!!!
Crash goes that hideous Amish beard on Zydrunas Ilgauskas. BTW - Nice of you to be a typical Euro and choke for a game seven (8 points and 3 rebounds).
Crash goes crazy Drew Gooden. Not much else to say here, I'm just glad he's gone.
Crash goes the most annoying PA announcer in the history of professional sports. I already said it once, but watch a Cavs home game and focus on the guy. You'll never want to attend a home Cavs game!
Crash goes the "LeBron should have received the MVP" talk. Relax, Brent Musburger, he'll get the MVP next season, even if he's not the best player.
Crash goes the notion that one Ultra Superstar can carry a weak roster to the NBA Finals.
You might think I'm a LeBron hater.... actually I'm not. Obviously he's one of the top five players in the game. Just like the Pistons in the late 80's, the Bulls in the late 80's and the Lakers in the late 90's, I feel one has to earn their way to glory. It takes a long time and a little luck (1999 Spurs) to get a championship level.
The media was jizzing all over themselves hoping, cheering and praying that LeBron would make the finals. LeBron will get his, just not for a few years. So relax...